AN EMS CHRISTMAS

'Twas the night before Christmas and all through our town,
Ambulances sat quietly-call volume was down.
Dispatchers and medics, without any calls,
All sttled all cozily within station walls.

The city grew silent as the night grew deep;
My partner and I settled in for some sleep.
But no sooner dreaming in our beds were we,
When dispatch awoke us, crying, "Hurry! Code 3!"

The call had come in for an MVA;
Some nutcase claimed he'd hit Santa's sleigh!
"Head trauma," we thought, as we gathered our gear,
"Or maybe a drunken driver - it's that time of year."

As we raced to the scene with our sirens and lights,
We hoped for the best, tonight of all nights.
We had no idea we were in for a surprise
And, on our arrival, couldn't believe our own eyes.

I said to my partner, "This must be a trick!
That man in the ditch just can't be St. Nick!"
A smashed-up sleigh! Toys thrown far and near!
And off to the side, a group of reindeer!

The driver of the car, with a bump on his head
Was crying and told us he wished he was dead.
"Oh, why did I have that one extra beer?
Now I've killed Santa - no Christmas this year!"

By now we'd decided that this was too strange,
So we tried to call backup, but were out of range.
"No radio contact," to my partner I said,
"I'll check that one while you dress this one's head."

I approached the man in the ditch with great care.
He was dressed so oddly - he gave me a scare.
He wore a red suit and a strange kind of hat.
I thought to myself, "Who dresses like that?"

Then he opened his eyes and said, "Do not fear.
Just please help me up - I must catch my reindeer."
I said, "The reindeer are fine, but stay where you are.
You've taken a pretty hard hit from that car."

I didn't want to leave him, so I let out a holler:
"We're gonna need backboard, head blocks and collar!"
As we worked, the man creid, "No! Please don't strap me down.
I have toys to deliver all over town!

All of the children tonight are depending on me
To get their presents under the Christmas tree."
"I'm sorry," I told him, as I shook my head sadly,
"You're going to the hospital - you've been hurt too badly."

He looked up at me and wiped away a tear
And told me, "The you must bring the Christmas presents this year!"
"Visit eery child's home in this town?" asked I.
"Sir, you must think I can make an ambulance fly!"

I thought I had made a serious blunder,
For his eyes grew steely, and hsi voice was like thunder.
"Now Dasher, now Dancer, now Prancer and Vixen,
Come Comet and Cupid and Donner and Blitzen!

Hitch onto that truck and take to the sky
For tonight, indeed, an ambulance will fly!"
I just shook my head as we loaded him in,
Then climbed in the cab and I just had to grin.

There were the reindeer, all in a row,
In front of the truck as if ready to go.
"That's cute," I thought. "I'll just go around."
But then they took off and our wheels left the ground!

Away we went, up over the trees,
Sailing along as light as a breeze.
We touched down on rooftops, delivering toys,
Dropping gifts for good little girls and boys.

We stopped briefly in the hospital's ambulance bay
And wheeled him to the ED - and hoped he'd stay.
"We'll call in report later," we said on our way.
"This man's turned our ambulance into a sleigh!"

Then off we flew, all through the night,
Delivering toys til the dawn's first light.
Finally, at our station, we headed down,
Both of us happy to be on the ground.

Dispatch was mad, but the more we explained,
The less they believed us and the more they looked pained.
So we sat in our quarters - boy, were we in trouble!
We turned on teh news and perked up on the double.

As the TV crews interviewed people around town,
It seems that some very strange things had gone down.
Tire tracks were found on a rooftop or two
And children said, "This year, Santa wore blue!"

I grinned at my partner and said, "It's no mystery!
This Christmas we will go down in EMS history!"


1997 - 2019
The Byrum Web Site
Webmaster: The Web Walker